The bitter Network Administrator's Diaries

A Website Dedicated to Computer Professional...and some not so Professional

From the Network Administrator's Diaries 

Here's how my morning has gone:

 I get a call about half an hour ago from our Customer Service Manager. She put a new "ribbon" in her printer yesterday and she can't figure out how to get it to work. I ask her, "A ribbon? You have a printer that uses a ribbon?" She answers, "Yes, and I can't get it to work. Can you help me?"

 I go over to her office, and see her open HP LaserJet 6P, with a broken cartridge sitting next to it. I say, "Jane (name changed to protect the idiot), that's not a ribbon. It's a cartridge. Laser printers don't use ribbons." She answers, "Oh, sorry, I thought that's what you call it. I looked all over the office, and there are no more of these for my printer. This is the old one."

 I go to the supply room and find two of them. One box is open, and in it is a beaten-up, off-brand cartridge. I say, "Some idiot put an old cartridge back in the supply room! I can't believe this!" So she says, "Oh, I guess I put the old one back by mistake."

 We go back to her office. It turns out she knew she took the new one and broke it, because next to the printer, mostly covered by a mound of papers, were the recycling instructions and the installation instructions with the blue HP logo. Turns out she took a new cartridge, tried to install it herself, broke the damn thing, put the old one back in the supply room, and came to me crying wolf.

 I fixed the cartridge she broke (she had taken the sliding drum cover right off it and bent the spring-loaded arms), put it into her printer and told her to try printing. Click, print, error. No paper in the printer. "What do I do now," she asks.

 I go around the corner and get her a ream of paper, expertly install it in her printer, because I've got so many years of training at this difficult task, and of course it prints.

 I drop the rest of the ream of paper on her desk, pull out the addressed, pre-printed, prepaid UPS label and tell her to ship the old one back for recycling.

 "Where do I ship it?"   "To the address on the label."   "And how do I send it?"   "It says UPS, right?"   "Hey, thanks so much for your help. I don't know what I'd do without you."   "Sure. It's my pleasure. <growling>"     Just thought I'd share that with you. Use it where you like it. Don't use my name.  =o)

More Printer Mayhem

Last week one of the office managers e-mailed the president of the company complaining that they've been having printer problems for sometime and every time they contact the computer department they are told nothing is wrong and made to feel stupid. She said that they were at their wits ends (I know, too easy) and demanded someone help them. 

So I took Dave, (Network Admin) and we drove to the office to find out what exactly they were having problems with. Apparently Dave was on the phone with them earlier and was trying to tell them that there was no paper in the printer and gave up. Something he didn't tell me until we got there. Not only was the printer out of paper but one computer was configured to print in the envelope tray and no one bothered changing it back. We tried our best not to make them feel stupid, but sometimes your best just isn't good enough.

Doug Chick

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