Here's how my
morning has gone:
I get a call about
half an hour ago from our Customer Service Manager. She put a new
"ribbon" in her printer yesterday and she can't figure
out how to get it to work. I ask her, "A ribbon? You have a
printer that uses a ribbon?" She answers, "Yes, and I
can't get it to work. Can you help me?"
I go over to her
office, and see her open HP LaserJet 6P, with a broken
cartridge sitting next to it. I say, "Jane (name changed to
protect the idiot), that's not a ribbon. It's a cartridge. Laser
printers don't use ribbons." She answers, "Oh, sorry, I
thought that's what you call it. I looked all over the office, and
there are no more of these for my printer. This is the old
I go to the supply
room and find two of them. One box is open, and in it is a
beaten-up, off-brand cartridge. I say, "Some idiot put an old
cartridge back in the supply room! I can't believe this!" So
she says, "Oh, I guess I put the old one back by
We go back to her
office. It turns out she knew she took the new one and broke it,
because next to the printer, mostly covered by a mound of papers,
were the recycling instructions and the installation instructions
with the blue HP logo. Turns out she took a new cartridge, tried
to install it herself, broke the damn thing, put the old one back
in the supply room, and came to me crying wolf.
I fixed the
cartridge she broke (she had taken the sliding drum cover right
off it and bent the spring-loaded arms), put it into her printer
and told her to try printing. Click, print, error. No paper in the
printer. "What do I do now," she asks.
I go around the
corner and get her a ream of paper, expertly install it in her
printer, because I've got so many years of training at this
difficult task, and of course it prints.
I drop the rest of
the ream of paper on her desk, pull out the addressed,
pre-printed, prepaid UPS label and tell her to ship the old one
back for recycling.
"Where do I
address on the label."
"And how do I
"It says UPS,
so much for your help. I don't know what I'd do without you."
my pleasure. <growling>"
Just thought I'd
share that with you. Use it where you like it. Don't use my name.
More Printer Mayhem
Last week one of the office
managers e-mailed the president of the company complaining that they've
been having printer problems for sometime and every time they contact the
computer department they are told nothing is wrong and made to feel
stupid. She said that they were at their wits ends (I know, too easy) and
demanded someone help them.
So I took Dave, (Network
Admin) and we drove to the office to find out what exactly they were
having problems with. Apparently Dave was on the phone with them earlier
and was trying to tell them that there was no paper in the printer and
gave up. Something he didn't tell me until we got there. Not only was the
printer out of paper but one computer was configured to print in the envelope
tray and no one bothered changing it back. We tried our best not to make
them feel stupid, but sometimes your best just isn't good enough.